I delivered a load over by clare to a great big two story house that had several chiminies stikin out of the roof. the people were amish and this wood was for the wood stoves. i delivered it down behind the barn. there was a big long dumpster that has a lot of doors down each side. it was about a 20 yard tub. after they paid me and left I had nose trouble and really wondered why amish would have a dumpster that big. so when they werent looking i opened the door and looked in. the thing was full of. ( get this ) empty gallon tin cans of thank you brand pie filling. frozen bread dough wrappers. empty cardboard boxes from pie crusts. sugar and cinnimon bags. welllllllllllllllllllll for the unknowing of you. around clare are all these horse and buggys selling home baked goods.. __________ more to this story _ oh yeah,,,,, I was invited in by this couple after i delivered a load of wood. i have been going there a long time. she gave me a piece of cherry pie. it reminded me of that dumpster full of thank you brand pie filling ( you know the one—- 22 cherries and almost 4 quarts of red colored corn starch ____ ) ya that one. well I let my mouth get going and I told her the story about the dumpster and what I had seen. and then added. ( you know. some husband bought one of those pies and took it home. stuk it under his old ladys nose and said. here is a pie. ))) hheee heee heeeee. this lady straightened up. didnt take her eyes off of me. pointed at her husband and said these words ( that m…..f….. did that very thing to me. ) his face got red. it was kinda quiet except for me choking. dammit. they havent called me bak. gotta remind myself to keep my yap trapped. jeezeee
took a load to a amish guy real early in the morning. it was still dark. unloaded and went to the barn. met the guy. he was milking. I asked him if he had a cow I could milk that wouldnt kik my head off. reason I ask is those cows are just as protective of their personal parts as most women and strange cold hands will get a serious reaction. he said. this one right here. soooooooooooooooooooo I took the stool. the pail. sat down and got personal with a big ashyre (sp) anyway. the smell and sounds of that barn took me bak to when i was little with my grandparents. I felt like I was 8 years old again. it was so sweet. when I got done i had a full pail of milk with a nice head on it. when I turned around there was 5 amish kids standing there in a row like stair steps. mouths wide open as were their eyes. handed them the pail of milk. got up. gave them the stool. went over by the dad. one of them said something in german to the dad. he started laughing.. the kid wanted to know how in the world a truck driver ever learned how to milk a cow. by hand yet. in 54 I was doing 8 in the morning and 8 at night. I could fill the cats mouth and his ears with milk from 12 feet away. used to spray it toward the cat. he would start liking. close his eyes and just get soaked. if i took the stream up. he stood up. how in hell he knew where the stream was going is amazed me. always figured out that his whiskers were like directional detectors for flying milk. any of you guys or girls ever do that. what a hoot
I was driving down a dirt road and this big squirrel jumped into the middle of the road. i blew the air horn. he turned around and went back. i blew the horn. just a short toot. he turned around and went back. after a dozen of these i was getting close so he headed down the road straight away from me. every time I tooted the horn he went a little faster. then started slowing down. i was really slow. just idling along. he was doingabout 10 miles a hour. I chased thatsquirrel almost a quarter a mile. he finally had enough. jumped over a little bush and tried going up a tree but was so tired he just hung there. lot better than his buddy did. i was coming thrugh hastings. saw a squirrel cross under my truck. didnt see him come out the other side but they are that quick. when i got home. there he was. he had jumped in the middle of the wheel. he was froze solid and when I stopped he fell out and was in a perfect half circle. was rocking back and forth. my dog thought he was still a working model and went off on the squirrel. NOT a good day.
had this load on my truck all winter. went out after frost laws. it was grassy and warm. home from fla. fired up the truk. there was a robin raisin hell around me as I was checking tires and stuff. i fired up the truck. got air and headed for rockford. got home. parked in about the same place. as I was getting my stuff out of the truck i saw her fly under the rear of the trailer. sooooooooooooooo i walked back and there on top of the spring shackles. in the middle of the 4 bolts sticking up was this robins nest with4 little robins with most of their feathers on. she was giving them worms.. i couldnt believe it. those little birds had 150 miles on them and they hadnt flown a inch. wondered what they told their mom. mom . we went to rockford. no shit. we did we did. we aint lyin. I took that nest over to a old piece of machinery. put it up inside a pully. she finishhed the job of raising them there.. NO problem
the customer was paying me. saw Dr, Rooks on his check. from s gr. I asked him that since the rush of wood burners and chain saw users was on did he see many chain saw accidents. he said. I wouldnt see then any way unless they did it on purpose. wtf. I said. he said. ya. I am a psychiatrist.. eee eee eee oh yeh.
I was stuck in the sand and the customer and i had been digging. got some carpet. worked for 4 solid hours getting the truck out. this lady was standing there. I was on my knees with the shovel. her husband was there. she said. ” have you ever been stuck so bad you never got out?” I looked at her and said. ” yup. still there. I am just a figment of your imagination ” her husband almost spit his teeth out. he busted out laughing like ahyeana.. after he got his composure he said ” oh. i am gonna pay for this ” that was even funnier yet. i still yuk over that one.
my dog rode with me for 12 years. he was black. hated the sun on him and his seat. that was black too sooooooooooo when i parked and the sun was on his side ofthe truck he wood come over and lay on t he floor by the pedals when I was out of the truck.
i was sitting at the picknick table getting my check from the lady. the truck was about 100 feet away. i heard the motor rev up big time. buster had stood on the gas pedal. and then again acouple of times. the truck sounded like it was getting my attention by revving up in a kind of pattern . it sounded like lets go lets go lets go. hurry up hurry up.
well buster knew he had dome something but i whistled really hard and hollered at him to knock it off. i saw him getup int he pass seat. the lady looked at me with her hands on herface. with this most awestruck look onher face. she said. oh my god. i cant believe it. that truck actually listened to you.
it took me a second and this was really hard to keep a straight face. I said. see that dog . he was on the floor and stepped on the gas pedal walking around down there. i whisteled to get his attention to get off the gas pedal. he is in the seat now. i can see him get back up there she did not see the dog. i then old her about my dog. then she saw him
then she put her head in her hands and said. oh my god. PLEASE don’t tell my husband.. never did. lady you are so precious. if you ever read this i cherish this memory ,
i was early to customer in frankfort. he worked in grocery store. i stopped by and he came out. his first load from me. i said hows this look. he said great. you can take the other guy his wood and bring me mine . i will be ready in half a hour. i said. this is 10 cord. its all yours. he started swearing . i said. what what what.. he said. ia have been buying half that for 10cord. untill you have seen 10 cord you dont know. he lives on 22 about 2 miles N of frankfort on the west side of the road directly across from the little barn that sells baked goods
it only takes me 1 min and 40 seconds to unload. this customer has had me there many times. he always watches. one time he cleaned of the tail end of the trailer to write the check he took his hand and wiped the dust off and looked at me and said. ” I love this trailer” the way he said it. how many times have you had someone come and put his hands on your tractor or mower and say something that cool and mean it. this trailer is awesome but to have someone appreciate it like he did. that kind of thing is way better than money.
I went to craig woods house down by ionia yesterday. got there it was dark no snow really tight yard. drove in. baked up. had to jocky several times to get trailer turned and behind me. baked in and unloaded. he said. damn you are good. in the dark. I said. been doing this since I was 8, step dad was way better than I am. if i cant get er done by now. better give up. answers the phone wood eye 1 or something like that. i had throat cancer and he talks like me. got a shovel full of gravel in our throat.
I got supper on. get outa here. what a hoot. awesome customer.
backed inthis garden. it was hot . dry in the fall. customer said to drive through the vegetables. there were a hundred spaghetti squashes. basketball size. thought it was going to be fun. drive my truk through the veggies. well it was payback from hell. i got in part way. when my drivers hit those sacks of slick.. get this. a spaghetti squash is a serious stucktruck trick. i had to shovel every single piece of them out of the track. sand the path and take my fingers and dig every piece of that slime out of the treads.
i had a full load on. could spin the tires in 4th gear make clouds of blue smoke and not move a single inch. the instant the tires got on a single piece of squash. i was fkd. no go joe. the absolutely worst i ever got stuck. hard ground. a spaghetti squash still gives me chills.
It was a driveway down by Holland. guy said to back up past the gravel with the trailer and push it off. the instant that traier came off the gravel it went into peat. the tail board was almost flat with the ground. it was almost 4 ft into the earth. did that ever look silly. wished i had a camera for that day.
took a monster tractor . i did push the wood off but that also went in pretty nice.. hay. its your property. how did I know.
delivered a load by Hastings. unloaded. lady came out she was walking around the pile. smelling of it. touching it. rubbing her face on the logs. putting her lips on them. like a cat. all over that wood. even rubbed her hands and body against it. i asked her husband if there was something wrong with the wood. he said nope. she loves her fireplace. worked at a hospitalal as a trauma nurse. it was her relaxation thing. I still can see her making love to that pile of wood. she actually loved that wood. just like a cat. it was amazing to watch.
had a guy live up by rapid city on a hill. a monster of a hill. he asked what i thought of the road coming up. i said. well. I kinda felt sorry for the billy goat that i passed laying on the side of it with the broke legs and the oxygen mask. other than that it was pretty cool.
I had unloaded. my sled was at the back of the trailer. guy was talking to me. he said. my 2 year old has climbed on your trailer . please don’tfreak out when you see him. just act natural. I turned around. there was a 2 year old standing on TOP of that sled. it was a 4×4 box beam and he wasn’t holding onto nothing. just standing there looking up at the sky. he turned around and came down like a monkey. to the bak of the truck down he came. to the front. up and on it again. all over the place. the guy said that one day he heard t he kid and couldn’t find him. looked up and at the very top of a 60 ft tv tower that is screwed to the side of his house was this kid. he had climbed althe way to t he top.. kid has a unusualal name. thor. axle zeuse or someting like that . amazing.
jim ashley from scotts . about 80 uses a little chainsaw. kids do a lot but he does too. had a stroke. brain tumor. left side all paralyzed. i said. well jim. looks to me like you are all “right ” now.bought his old minneapolis moline combine from him. totally awesome combine. use it every year. beautiful machine. just awesome
the fuel is starting to burn us up in this business. save on my advertising costs. please share my webb site with people that need firewood. thank you. al